Today, Blade loses his edge in ...
The Daywalker returns yet again, cutting down vampire muthafuckas as usual. That is, until he's framed for killing a human, and now the police and the feds are closing in on his ass. Blade is captured, but he's soon rescued by Abigail (Jessica Biel), the daughter of his old buddy Whistler, and a cured vampire named Hannibal King (Ryan Reynolds). The new trio then team up to stop a group of bloodsuckers who have just resurrected the original vampire, Dracula (Dominic Purcell).
Blade: Trinity is one of the very few Marvel movies I had not seen before starting this series. Man, am I glad I skipped out on it when it was first released. This is Wesley Snipes's third go-around as the character of Blade, and he is visibly unenthused. I don't blame him, because, compared to the first two, this movie- bad pun intended- sucks. New Line Cinema decided to give the director reins to series writer, David Goyer, and he clearly had no interest in taking the franchise into any new directions. All Goyer did was retread the groundwork laid by Stephen Norrington and Guillermo del Toro in the other films. Expect he made things louder, flashier, and a whole lot dumber. It's really easy to see how awful a writer David Goyer is when he's left to his own devices. As a result, what was cool and badass in the other Blade movies is now unintentionally hilarious. Blade: Trinity sees the franchise descending into self-parody. What was once such a hip, innovative franchise suddenly found itself left behind by its imitators
You know what would have been a better third Blade? One that would've embraced the old-school horror of the comic that introduced the character, The Tomb of Dracula. I think that would have been the logical next step following the Eastern Europe atmosphere of Blade II. Think about it: Blade's trademark action set pieces mixed in with gothic castles, dungeons, full moons, fog, etc.? How about Rachel Van Helsing instead of a daughter Whistler somehow forgot to mention was a) still alive, and b) a vampire hunter? And how about a more traditional Dracula instead of a meatball? I can dream, can't I?
I'll still watch Blade: Trinity again if it comes on, though. The saving graces are the intentional comic relief provided by Ryan Reynolds and the fact that I can take it now as a self-parody. I'll take that over any of the serious-minded Blade rip-offs any day of the week. That's right, Underworld, I'm looking at you.
Blade: Trinity
2 out of 5 Cap shields
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