So, how are we kicking this off? What was the first feature based on a Marvel comic? The movie that would open the flood gate of Marvel characters on the big screen? The film that would becoming the standard by which all future Marvel movies would be judged? That turned out to be...
Produced by Lucasfilm and released by Universal Pictures in the summer of 1986, Howard the Duck begins on a planet populated by little people in bad duck costumes. Here, working stiff Howard (Eight actors are "billed" in the part) is all of a sudden beamed out of his apartment, into space, and lands in an alley here on Earth, specifically Cleve-Land. Despite being chased around by the natives, the pint-sized, loud-mouthed fowl rescues would-be rock star Beverly (Lea Thompson) from a couple of punk weirdos, and the two become unlikely friends. However, what begins as your typical fish-out-of-water comedy unexpectedly turns into a bizarro sci-fi romp involving giant lasers, Dark Overlords of the Universe, and Cajun sushi diners.
Now, despite being 86'd at the box office in '86 and becoming the butt of every lame duck joke in pop culture, this really isn't "the worst movie ever made". Gasp? C'mon, I've seen much, much worse than this. So have you. I dig the weirdness of the concept. Despite the limitations of the suit, Howard is a character worth rooting for, and the over-the-top performance of eventual baddie, Jeffrey Jones, is a hoot. I think the humor still works. In the way rubber chickens are funny. Or fake dog shit. You know you shouldn't be laughing, because it's dumb, but you do anyways. Plus, I also admire the random tonal shift from fish-out-of-water comedy to outlandish outer space monster movie, unintentional as it may be.
Still, Howard the Duck fails, because it is a piss-poor adaptation. I blame that solely on arrogance. The arrogance of George Lucas, co-writer Gloria Katz, and co-writer/director William Hyuck to take this satirical comic book, with its 70s stoner fantasy sensibility, and tame it into the next Star Wars for the ultra-conservative 1980s. Forget Lea Thompson's big hair and the goofy Thomas Dolby tunes; Howard the Duck is a product of its day, for it was made by people who had no understanding of- nor cared about- the source material. So, no, I don't think Howard the Duck is "the worst movie ever made". It is, rather, an embarrassment to comic book movies as we know them today.
- JDO
Howard the Duck
A very generous 2 out of 5 Captain America Shields
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